What is love?

It’s standing by your side, watching you with a lowered brow, seeing you smile. Even when you’re silent, I still feel delighted.

It’s having my eyes on you when you’re around, my heart with you when you’re not.

It’s holding hands and growing old together.

Love can be expressed in countless ways, varying from person to person. Ultimately, it boils down to paying attention to you, treating you well, and making sacrifices for you.

What kind of emotion is most touching?

Perhaps as Zhou Guoping said: “The emotions that truly move people are always simple and unadorned, silent yet deeply buried.”

This kind of love, though unspoken, can leave a lasting impression in one’s heart and evoke profound emotions.

For instance, there is a kind of love that involves loving you while pretending to despise you.

This so-called disdain is not genuine, but rather an attempt to mask the intense love within.

In the TV drama “Parents’ Love,” Jiang Defu and Angie come from different family backgrounds, with significant disparities in their upbringings.

Angie looks down on Jiang Defu’s rough appearance, while Jiang Defu feels Angie treats herself like a princess.

Despite Angie’s inferior family background and multiple instances of help from Jiang Defu, the two eventually marry.

The start of marriage also means exposing more flaws in each other.

Angie despises Jiang Defu for not showering before bed, not changing into pajamas, eating noisily, and using chopsticks to eat steak.

However, through spending time together, Angie discovers many good qualities in Jiang Defu—his wit, charm, authenticity, and simplicity.

Though Angie may still complain about Jiang Defu’s flaws later on, deep down, she has grown dependent on him and is willing to endure hardships together.

Her disdain is merely an attempt to change Jiang Defu for the better, helping him develop good habits.

In real life, many of us are similar.

When we love someone, we seldom express it directly, preferring to show it silently. What we desire is for the other person to feel our love, not just hear about it.

Surface-level disdain can also be seen as a way to seek the other person’s attention.

Just as Sanmao said: “If what you give me is the same as what you give others, then I don’t want it.”

Likewise, since I love you, my attitude towards you naturally differs from others.

Towards others, I won’t show disdain or speak harshly, as I prefer not to draw attention or have any connection with them.

But when I’m with you, I might show disdain, hoping you’ll see me differently, start paying attention to me, and understand the genuine emotions behind my disdain.

I recall two colleagues from my previous company. The male colleague would chat with the female colleague every day, but the conversations often turned into verbal attacks.

He would comment on her dark skin or short height, displaying various forms of disdain towards her.

Initially, the female colleague felt upset hearing such comments, as having one’s shortcomings pointed out by others can be distressing.

Later, another female colleague intervened when she heard the male colleague talking about the female colleague again: “You always mention her dark skin. Do you think I have dark skin too?”

The male colleague innocently replied: “Oh, do you? I never noticed.”

This scenario exemplifies the saying, “Onlookers see more than the players.”

Despite the male colleague’s frequent displays of disdain towards the female colleague, it stemmed from his affection for her. Naturally, he would pay attention to her, getting to know everything about her. As for others, he remained indifferent, showing no interest in their affairs.

Hugo once said: “The first sign of true love in a boy is shyness, while in a girl, it’s boldness.”

Due to the boy’s shyness, when he develops feelings for a girl, he chooses an opposite approach rather than expressing his affection directly.

Because I love you, I pretend to dislike you; because I care for you, I pretend to despise you.

However much I disdain you externally, that’s how much I love you internally.

In the face of love, many people are like this—deeply in love yet hesitant to confess their feelings, fearing exposure.

The more fearful they are, the deeper they bury their love. The more they love, the more they pretend to despise on the surface.

This kind of love is called loving you while pretending to despise you.

Just as Tagore said: “My eyes rain for you while my heart holds an umbrella.”

No matter how much one appears to dislike or despise you, deep down, they cherish you.

Perhaps they struggle with expressing themselves, fear rejection, or simply want to grab your attention.

In the end, this is their way of loving you—silently, covertly. They want to be noticed but fear being discovered.

When it comes to love, don’t focus on what the other person says, but rather observe their actions. By looking into their eyes and behavior, you can decipher their true feelings.